Somewhere Over the Rainbow

We meant to post this duet a couple months ago. Clara and Kate sing Somewhere Over the Rainbow. Eat your heart out Dorothy!

The Home Stretch

Thanksgiving night Clara went to bed early and with only minor cajoling from her parents, giving Paul and Kate a rare chance to relax before heading to sleep themselves. During our conversations, Kate informs Paul that she is officially finished with nesting in preparation for Baby Sister. The itch has been scratched; the compulsion has been satisfied. This after the bulk of trimester three has been gobbled up by Kate's Tasmanian devil-like whirling to pack up an old house, move into a new one, turn it into a comfortable home in no time flat (i.e., no signs of moving boxes after just two weeks of being here), and get a nursery situated just right to satisfy those demands of an expecting mother that her infant will be cozy and comfortable from the get go.  

The nesting urge is either complete or exhausted. Either way, the point being, Kate feels ready. Due date is December 6th, she stops working after tomorrow, and she hopes to spend that week (if Baby Sister decides to comply with the schedule) relaxing and getting a little extra QT with Clara.

Kate is now seeing the OB each week for check-ups. She went in for her strep-B test last week, and when the doctor checked her weight he noticed she remains a few pounds behind the curve. As they say, she is all belly. He gave her precise instructions to remedy that.

Doctor: I need you eating more protein. Double up on those meat portions.

Kate: Well, okay.

Doctor: I need you eating more fat. Get more of that in your diet, too.

Kate: Well, okay.

Doctor: And I want you to eat ice cream every night. Have as much as you can get down.

Kate: Sweeeetttt!

We have our emergency help team scheduled through the end of November in case Baby Sister comes early. On December 1, we get some help by way of Barb and Ted going to the beach via Raleigh. Kate managed to rope her mom into camping out with us until the baby comes, being our go-to lady for attending to Clara's needs when we have to rush off to Rex Hospital.

With the nesting instinct satisfied, Kate is turning her considerable gestating energy to wrapping up this slow deliberation of Baby Sister's actual name (no, Clara, we're sorry...we won't be calling her Baby Sister forever). We think we've settled on a handful of options that we'll take with us to the hospital. Much as we did with Clara, we'll just have to see which one (if any) seems to fit our first impressions upon meeting this little girl.  

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas...in November

Clara is developing a fixation with the princess-pushing pig Olivia. (Today, in fact, she and Kate went to Clara's first ever movie, Olivia's Wintertime Cheer, in the IMAX theater at Marbles Kids Museum.) Among her favorite readings for the moment is a book called Olivia Helps with Christmas in which the little pig family does all its Christmas preparations, including cutting and decorating a tree, on Christmas Eve. Indeed, we're told that this was common practice back in the day.

Quoth our Clara, "Not on my watch!"

Today, one full month before Santa's visit, we purchased our Christmas tree and prepared it for all the trimmings to come. (Upon viewing it, Clara says "I think Santa will like this.") If it comes down before the new year - and if it comes down without much wailing and consternation from a certain two year old - Paul will be very surprised.

If one wishes to front load one's Christmas celebration into November, Raleigh provides plenty opportunity. This we discovered in a quick three day sprint of Santa Clause at Cameron Village (Thursday, November 17th), the Raleigh Christmas Parade downtown (Saturday, November 19th), and the North Hills Mall Tree Lighting (Saturday, November 19th).  

For the first visit with Santa, Paul and Kate were nearly hauled before Child Protective Custodies for the severely neglectful act of forgetting to bring a camera. We stood in line for 20 minutes, Paul musing that Clara would become timid in the face of the GREAT BEARDED ONE, stick her hand in her mouth, and clam up without making the much anticipated gift request.

Not so. Clara plopped herself firmly on Santa's lap, he asked her what she wanted, and she didn't hesitate: A big girl's bike! Santa even tested her with a follow-up question. What should you wear on your head while riding a big girl's bike? Uh, uh, uh. A helmet! Here's your mini-candy cane kid. Hey parents, seriously, bring your camera next year. Don't you even love your child?!

Clara on her way to the Raleigh Christmas Parade

Saturday morning, as we were rushing to get into the car for the parade, and Clara was pulling her pokey routine, we reminded her that Santa Clause would be at the parade, too. A new Santa, she asked? Uh-oh. It would seem our two-year-old was nearing a discovery that might require a parental discussion on par with birds and bees and that cute little animals have go to heaven someday. We hesitated to hear how she might explain to herself the reason why the various Santas we see look different and are clearly not the same individual.

While we can't recall the exact words, Clara provided a thoughtful discourse along the lines of...the real Santa is busy at the North Pole and these are his helpers. Ah, there are few better examples of cognitive dissonance and the lengths we go - even the youngest of us - to resolve conflicts when the reality we prefer locks horns with the reality we observe.

Clara meets Rudolph at North Hills

Thanksgiving 2011

We gathered around our table, this little North Carolina branch of the Dryden and McKnight families, preparing to launch ourselves at the mini-feast of turkey and fixings we prepared together, and paused for a moment to reflect on all the things we have to be thankful for. They are many. 

We miss our extended family over the holiday, but we have come to enjoy the quiet of staying home for Thanksgiving, a practice we have observed for at least six years. We had beautiful weather, making for a nice stroll to the park, a game of soccer with Clara, and some time just lingering in the warm sun. 

We opted for putting a turkey breast into the slow-cooker, starting the process around 8am. It didn't make for the exact same photo-op we've recorded with Clara the previous two years, but she begrudgingly consented to sitting beside the Crockpot for a couple pictures. Paul loves making the year-by-year photo comparisons...

Dinner was at 3:30. Clara took a stronger interest in eating out of the serving dishes than she did her own plate. Nonetheless, she nearly allowed Kate a full meal before demanding her attention elsewhere.

Clara went down early tonight. A benefit, we think, of all the fresh air she breathed today (plus some tryptophan). Putting on pajamas is never a quick process, almost always requiring interruptions, diversions, side-projects, and trickery. Tonight, Clara wanted to perform ballet for us.When you get a recital like this, how can you not comply...

Much to be thankful for, indeed.

1/2 Marathon Streak Ends

For the past eight years, either Kate or Paul (and nearly always both) ran the Kiawah Half-Marathon. Because of Baby Sister's imminent arrival, that streak ends this year. But Paul questions Kate's decision after reading the article below. 

It should be noted that Kate did run the Cooper River Bridge Run in April while somewhere around three or four weeks pregnant with Baby Sister...even setting a 10K personal best in the process. Why not Kiawah at 41 weeks?

Woman gives birth after running Chicago Marathon

CHICAGO (AP) -- A pregnant suburban Chicago woman felt contractions a few minutes after finishing the Chicago Marathon and gave birth hours later to a baby daughter.

Amber Miller was nearly 39 weeks pregnant when she started the 26.2 mile race on Sunday morning. The DuPage County woman tells The Daily Herald in a telephone interview from her hospital bed that her doctor allowed her to run half the race and walk half the race.

Miller says she felt contractions after finishing at 6 hours and 25 minutes. When the contractions became regular she stopped to get a sandwich and then went to the hospital. Her baby girl June was born at 10:29 p.m. weighing 7 pounds, 13 ounces.

Miller says she's happy but calls Sunday "the longest day of my life."

Clara Soccer: Week Two Practice

Soccer practice is actually a 45 minute medley event. Today it included some soccer drills, dodge ball, tee ball,  tossing practice, and an obstacle course. What we learned is that, while left-handed for most events, Clara kicks with her right foot and bats tee ball as a right-hander. But she throws as a lefty. She is either ambidextrous or ambiguous-dextrous. 

We're also enjoying watching Clara get so excited about being part of a team activity...so much so that she didn't hesitate for a moment (running straight onto the field) even though we had her dressed in a short-sleeved t-shirt in chilly and rainy weather. She even refused to come off the field for a potty break despite performing a very recognizable squeezing-it routine within minutes of practice beginning.  And she so clearly wished her Daddy would be a bit more discrete than walking straight up to the drills and snapping pictures the whole time. He definitely got the  Daddddy...not around my friends! look.

October 2011 Reflections

Another Franklin Golden special.

Preparations for Baby Sister

The excitement is building for Baby Sister's arrival. Paul took Clara to Rex Hospital for some assistance from its official safety seat inspection professional, Mr. Chris. (He helps befuddled dads get babyseats into their cars.) Clara giggled and meowed loudly for attention as Paul and Mr. Chris yanked, prodded, and did all they could to contain curse words while attaching the Graco base to a vehicle that just seemed obstinate in the face of our efforts. 

As we were driving away, Paul explained to Clara that this was the hospital where she was born and in just a few weeks, Baby Sister would be born there, too. The older sister developed a concerned look on her face, eventually asking "Won't Baby Sister be scared?" We pursued that question a bit and discovered that Clara was worried that her little sister would come out of Mama's belly and not know where she is. "I think she's going to cry," she said. 

With the clock ticking, we've begun that stage of preparation where we think through the logistics of what to bring to the hospital, what bag we'll pack, what route we'll take, who will care for Clara if Baby Sister decides to come earlier than expected, and - of course - ensuring that we'll have a car seat sufficiently secured to bring Baby Sister back home. 

After we finished the most intense part of the move, Kate developed a nasty case of project-itis...otherwise known as nesting. If things went quiet for a few minutes - you know,  a little too quiet - Clara and Paul knew we could just creep up to Baby Sister's nursery and find Mama preparing the crib with bedding, rearranging diapers in their special pink basket, or folding and re-folding onesies...while holding them up from time to time, cocking her head to the side, and saying wistfully "oh, they're just so tiny." 

This instinct is powerful. If memory serves, we can expect most of November will be spent in similar activities. Come hell or high water, Kate will make sure this environment is as cozy for Baby Sister as any mother could make it. 

Christmas Excitement

Clara is on the retail schedule for Christmas. In other words, no sooner are the ghouls and goblins of Halloween relegated to the dumpster bins than the Frostys and Rudolphs are hauled into prime shelf space.

On a recent trip to Costco, Paul teased Clara with an impossible question: "Clara, tell me, who are you more excited to see this December? Baby Sister or Santa Clause?"  She paused, bit down hard, and seemed to blush a bit before responding - a bit sheepishly - Santa Clause.  What a cruel test of a two-year-old's loyalties!

As we type, she is watching the Christmas episode of Barney (ugh, why won't he just go extinct?!) via YouTube on Kate's iTouch. She is already making polite suggestions for where the Christmas Tree should go (can we put off getting it until Thanksgiving weekend?). And just last night she refused all of Kate's suggested lullaby songs until Mama reached the Yule Tide playlist in her deep, deep repertoire. 

Mercurial As a Two-Year Old

This phrase has not found its way into parenting parlance...yet. Perhaps we'll apply for the trademark. Paul's observation is that...The highs are high; the lows are low; and you'll never guess which way the wind will blow.

When Clara is in a good mood, she is absolutely delightful, parenting is bliss, and we think "this next kid will be a cinch!" But the clouds move in with no warning. And, oh boy, these lows. On the plus side, they seem to have been less frequent in October than in months passed. But then the other hand, when they come they are marked by higher intensity and this certain willfulness that hints at recognition of what's happening (i.e., she kind of knows what she's doing and might have some control over it but is doing it anyway). 

It should be no surprise that the temperament shifts frequently revolve around sleep and potty and have been the worst where the two collide. 

For example, Clara has improved her sleep drastically through much of October. 8:45 pm seems to be the magical time when she'll fall asleep (irrespective of when you start the going-down process), she'll wake at least once in the night (usually between 3 and 4 am), and then she's up for the morning sometime between 6:30 and 7:30. This regiment is a vast improvement over the past, and we're glad to take it depending on what happens at the 3-4 am wake up. 

That wake up seems to correspond with her need to go potty. (Great news! She's staying dry through most the night!) On good nights, she calls from her bed for either Mama or Daddy, we get her, we take her to the bathroom, she does her business, we walk with her back to the bed, and she falls back asleep while one of us stays with her. On bad nights, she follows the same sequence, and all seems copacetic, until we start taking off her pull-up for the potty. With no warning, she just dissolves. 

Imagine all the following in escalating tantrum mode: "I don't want to go potty!!" Okay, we'll take you back to bed. "But I need to go potty!!" Okay, then let me help you. "But I don't want to go potty!!" Okay, then I'm going back to bed and you come get me if you need help. "But Mama/Daddy, I really need you to help me!!" Okay, let's take off your pull-up. "NOOOOO!!" Do you want me to help or not? "I really have to go, I really have to go!" Good, let me help you. "No! I want to do it myself....I need privacy." Okay, come get me if you need me. "Mama/Daddy HELP ME!!!"

This can continue for 20, 30, 40 minutes. It's sheer lunacy I tell you. And speaking from experience, you just don't win when you negotiate with a lunatic. By definition, the lunatic is a brinksman willing to take you to the edge and maybe even off the cliff. It's a giant game of chicken and she's just crazy enough to crash. So, you better make that first move. Swerve! 

The lunatic and her friends at the pumpkin patch.

The only solution we have is to change the rules of the game. If you engage her on her terms while she's in lunatic mode, YOU WILL NEVER WIN. She'll take you deep into the abyss. So we change the subject, divert her attention, act insane ourselves, anything to change the game. Paul is like a band that just knows one tune (reverse psychology on steroids). He goes straight for the challenge: "Okay Clara, you can't go potty right now. No, no, no. The potty is only for big girls, and I don't think you're a big girl." Somehow it tends to work. One night, our recollection of which is a bit spotty, we recall that Paul spent at least 10 minutes clambering around the floor saying he was a squirrel and he needed Clara squirrel to help him find acorns for his nest. Insane, right? Absolutely. But when dealing with someone in that lunatic frame of mind...And it ultimately worked.

And then one other morning stands out in our memories. It must be sometime past 8 am. Clara did wake up at 3:30, but she went back to sleep without incident and whichever parent was with her (probably Kate) was able to sneak back to spend the rest of the night in our bed. So Paul and Kate wake up naturally...via sunlight streaming through the windows instead of blood-curdling screams for attention...sit up in bed and read for a bit. Then we hear some rustling down the hall. Clara is clearly awake. But it remains quiet for several more minutes. Odd. Then we hear the pitter patter of little feet in footsie pajamas. They shuffle down the hall a short distance and then return in the opposite direction. It happens again. Paul peaks out the door to see Clara going into Baby Sisters room, looking around, and then running back to her own room in some sort of game she's concocted. Soon enough she runs into our room, spilling forth with ebullient giggles. She jumps into bed with us, a round of hugs, more giggles.

The highs are high and so delightful. Still, we have to ask. Clara, what game were you playing...what were you doing in Baby Sister's room? "I was looking for Baby Sister's toys," she responded. "I wanted to play with her toys."

The Queen is Dead, Long Live the King

Paul and Kate are now officially a king-sized bed couple. That's actually overstated. We will continue thinking of ourselves as a queen-sized couple, very comfortable with the old mattress Paul brought into this marriage. Not until the introduction of Clara did we ever imagine the queen seeming small. But as our sister-in-law Deidra notes, one too many nights "brought to you by the letter 'H'" (i.e., Mama as upright line, Daddy as upright line, and Clara as the squirming, squiggling, kicking hash across the middle) gets you thinking seriously about an upgrade. And so it is. With Baby Sister coming, we bit the bullet and bought the king. We have visions of extra sleeping space galore. We hope we're not making another entry in two years with rationalizations for why we had to upgrade to the California King.

Sleep Talking...

At the start of what was several night series of middle night fits, Clara calls out to Mama (while still asleep)...

"But who's going to take care of me?"

And later...

"No, don't throw my food on the ground! Daddy, don't let her do that!"

Clara Joins a Soccer Team

We can't believe this took almost three years to achieve, but Clara finally landed her first soccer sponsor. Second Empire, a posh eatery in downtown Raleigh, has partnered with coach-to-the-toddlers Scott to bring together a group of five three-ish year olds for a weekly scrimmage.  

Clara took to the first practice con mucho gusto. In a rarity, she dropped her Caillou-playing iTouch with zero hesitation when Kate told her it was time for soccer, throwing her hair back in a ponytail and jumping into her car seat. She sprinted onto the field upon arriving at the park, hardly looking over her shoulder to see her Mama holding back sniffles at the first glimpse of daughter taking up her beloved team sport.

Clara had no trouble hanging with the older girls. They played for the better part of an hour, running hard,  going through kicking drills, learning to drag-back the ball instead of picking it up with your hands, and how to play duck-duck-goose (an ice breaker for introduction purposes we think).

Our daughter (perhaps we should start saying our oldest daughter now) has been getting more and more excited about soccer. A little over a year ago she attended her first match, watching the Davidson Wildcats take on the Presbyterian Blue Hose down in Charleston.

Just last weekend Kate took her to see our neighborhood Meredith College Avenging Angels play near our house. And just as we started packing up for the move from Frank Street last month, Clara uncovered Kate's old soccer tote filled with cleats, shin guards, socks, and the jersey from her Columbia co-ed team. The older daughter was excited to try it all on for size. 

We don't want to force a specific sport onto our daughters, but Kate has such fond memories of playing soccer each autumn, of the camaraderie of being with her girls, and (of course) of the occasional heroics about which she is far too modest to brag (but not her husband!) such as this Southern Conference championship game winning strike many, many years ago...